Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Good Morning, Starshine!

It's been a couple of weeks since my last update. Sorry about that. School and fraternity stuff have kept me pretty busy. I don't even get on Twitter as much as I'd like to. But honestly, I feel like I have nothing to say. Everyone blogs about tips and tricks and struggles they've overcome. Inspirational stories, what they're working on, how it is to be agented. I just don't have anything to say.

I read books and work on my own novel when I can. I try to help other people with their work. I try to have a social life (and I fail miserably at it). And then I get online and the words are just gone. I'm not afraid to say them. I'm not worried that I might not be the best person to talk about a certain subject (though I do wonder sometimes). Mostly, I just don't have any words left at all.

I write reviews over books I read, and sometimes I even question that. It's so hard to rate a book, but at the same time I feel like I have to when every book site out there seems to have a star rating out beside the title. So I try to focus on the things I liked or didn't like, and then I wonder what the author will think when they see my 3 star review. Will they hate me because I didn't think their book was right for me? Because I didn't care for the way they wrote it or their characters? I certainly hope not, because I hope to be among them one day. Still, I wonder.

I think about the people who have been blogging for years and are just now running out of topics. How do they do it? I have nothing to say. And maybe it's because I don't have anyone here to talk to about books and writing most days. But you would think that would leave me with an abundance of things to say instead. I don't know.

And I think about all of you reading this. Why are you here? Why do read my blog when I ramble about stupid things and don't say anything worth hearing? I'm not teaching you how to be a better writer or imparting any great wisdom on you, and yet here you are. And I feel compelled to post things, to keep you entertained, to keep you around. But I don't have anything else.

I have a book that I'm working on. I'm trying to move across the country to get a job in publishing, and I'm trying to do it with very little money. I'm trying to find a way to get paid for doing what I love. And I may crash and burn, at which point I don't know what I'll do, much less how I'll do it.

So here I am, typing up a post that says absolutely nothing and says everything at exactly the same time. I am here. And you are here. And I guess that's all that really matters.

4 comments:

Jaimie said...

I like your thoughts. That's why I read them. Personal connection, man. (Said in "the Dude" voice.)

I've been blogging for... since 2004. For 7 years? I don't run out of topics because I just talk about what's going on with me, or what I've learned about writing (this is constant). Or a snippet of my writing. Life changes. As it does, you get more blog topics.

Heather said...

Your second to last paragraph summed up pretty much why I keep returning to read and keep following you. Writing used to be a lonely, long, hard road and thanks to the internet we can cut out the lonely part. Besides, you're pretty awesome. You can do it, you will do it. I've heard the fire and determination in you and I have no doubts. ;)

Amanda J. said...

I love you guys. Seriously. <3

Jade said...

I feel EXACTLY the same. Except for the moving to NYC thing. And the fraternity stuff.

When I first started blogging, I did it daily. Then it went to Mon-Fri. Then to a couple of times a week. Now I'm lucky to post once a week. I feel like I've said everything I have to say for the moment. Which means it's time for me to get an agent--just so I have new blog topics.

Love ya!

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